Thank you Kate. Agree 100% with your every word. I really do hope people are beginning to wake up. It’s a sickening situation. A cult. Extreme misogyny. You will be a great asset to Refuge. I too witnessed appalling domestic abuse as a child, every weekend, as my stepfather beat my mother & her frequent suicidal attempts. It’s scarred me for life, it destroyed my (late) younger brother who became a chronic alcoholic wife beater.
Caroline — as per my comment in response to Catriona, above, thank you for your honesty and bravery here in public. I VERY MUCH appreciate the support I've received from subscribers, strangers and friends alike — as well as all the private messages on social media., some of which have really shocked/surprised me. There is a lot of pain around these issues — both the domestic violence AND the place where it intersects with some men using trans rights as, effectively, a sanctioned smokescreen-cum-alternative route towards abuse of women. It's DEFINITELY going on... :(
At last. Excellent article. Well said. I agree entirely. I’m very disappointed that more feminist writers that usually have lots of opinions have been silent.
I see so much misogyny in my work and in my life and I appreciate it being called out in public like this. And you are so right, the threat to feminism here is enormous. I am distraught that you had to endure what you did as a child, it punches me in the stomach whenever I think about it. I am glad it made you rise up and write like this, I am glad it made you stand up for women. I am glad you exist and I love you x
I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to discover that you are a TERF. We are both 1964 vintage and I've loved you ever since your Observer days. I still have my copy of The Heart-shaped Bullet which I read and re-read and re-read because it resonated so perfectly with my own horrible love life and broken heart. I'm so glad everything seems to have worked out well for you, as it has for me - I am now happily married with a grown-up son. Love and best wishes to you and stay TERFy.
Hi Kathryn - Venice Allan and I are organising a social in SE London and would love to invite you. If I email an invitation to Jonny Geller at Curtis Brown, will he pass it on?
This is absolutely excellent & I 100% agree with you. So well articulated. Am skint at present but shall subscribe asap. Wonderful to be able to read you again xxx
Thank you Kate once again for putting the words to my feelings. I too reject the label ‘cis’ - I don’t recall anyone asking whether that’s how I identify. I also grew up in a household with an abusive father (mainly emotional but the occasional fist if anyone called him out) and I was relatively sympathetic because I understood his history and the damage he had suffered. But thanks to feminism, some strong female role models and a diet of Fay Weldon et al, I grew up knowing I didn’t have to tolerate that and shouldn’t. I agree that your fascinating idea about feminism v feminisation is a worthy subject for another day and I can’t wait to read it - and could it please have a tiny jab at the sort of people who start every written response to synthetic niceness with ‘awww’ ?
Thank you, Cat. Your public support and insightful words are much appreciated. Unsurprisingly, I've been deluged with private messages on this topic and I totally understand why; some of the stories are heartbreaking and I totally get that not everyone wants their trauma seen in public... however, I applaud those who do. Sending much love. K X
Thank you, thank you so much. You have articulated exactly how I feel. In fact I’m effing furious about what is going on. Ireland is the worst. Swapped priests telling women what to for men in drag telling women what to do assisted by the modern day sacristans- lefty women desperate to be seen as progressive & liked by men. I grew up in a deeply misogynistic patriarchy and after tentative progress I feel we are going backwards. As usual it’s women who are expected to make all the accommodations for men. I have male friends, who I thought were sensitive & intelligent literally wagging their fingers in my face ticking me off & shouting me down - right side of history my arse.
Thank you Kate. Agree 100% with your every word. I really do hope people are beginning to wake up. It’s a sickening situation. A cult. Extreme misogyny. You will be a great asset to Refuge. I too witnessed appalling domestic abuse as a child, every weekend, as my stepfather beat my mother & her frequent suicidal attempts. It’s scarred me for life, it destroyed my (late) younger brother who became a chronic alcoholic wife beater.
I could go on but, that’s another story. xx
Caroline — as per my comment in response to Catriona, above, thank you for your honesty and bravery here in public. I VERY MUCH appreciate the support I've received from subscribers, strangers and friends alike — as well as all the private messages on social media., some of which have really shocked/surprised me. There is a lot of pain around these issues — both the domestic violence AND the place where it intersects with some men using trans rights as, effectively, a sanctioned smokescreen-cum-alternative route towards abuse of women. It's DEFINITELY going on... :(
https://youtu.be/c-tzXvqtjkY
Thank you for this link, Caroline! X
At last. Excellent article. Well said. I agree entirely. I’m very disappointed that more feminist writers that usually have lots of opinions have been silent.
Thank you, Ellie :) x
Me too - if enough spoke out they couldn’t cancel everyone
I see so much misogyny in my work and in my life and I appreciate it being called out in public like this. And you are so right, the threat to feminism here is enormous. I am distraught that you had to endure what you did as a child, it punches me in the stomach whenever I think about it. I am glad it made you rise up and write like this, I am glad it made you stand up for women. I am glad you exist and I love you x
Thank you so much, Amity. Sending much love and sisterly solidarity - keep on catching the babies :) xxx
I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to discover that you are a TERF. We are both 1964 vintage and I've loved you ever since your Observer days. I still have my copy of The Heart-shaped Bullet which I read and re-read and re-read because it resonated so perfectly with my own horrible love life and broken heart. I'm so glad everything seems to have worked out well for you, as it has for me - I am now happily married with a grown-up son. Love and best wishes to you and stay TERFy.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Rachel - much appreciated. (And over in The Twitpit, too 😆🙌)
Hi Kathryn - Venice Allan and I are organising a social in SE London and would love to invite you. If I email an invitation to Jonny Geller at Curtis Brown, will he pass it on?
This is absolutely excellent & I 100% agree with you. So well articulated. Am skint at present but shall subscribe asap. Wonderful to be able to read you again xxx
Thank you so much… and it’s free to subscribe :)
Thank you Kate once again for putting the words to my feelings. I too reject the label ‘cis’ - I don’t recall anyone asking whether that’s how I identify. I also grew up in a household with an abusive father (mainly emotional but the occasional fist if anyone called him out) and I was relatively sympathetic because I understood his history and the damage he had suffered. But thanks to feminism, some strong female role models and a diet of Fay Weldon et al, I grew up knowing I didn’t have to tolerate that and shouldn’t. I agree that your fascinating idea about feminism v feminisation is a worthy subject for another day and I can’t wait to read it - and could it please have a tiny jab at the sort of people who start every written response to synthetic niceness with ‘awww’ ?
AWWWWW... ;)
Thank you, Cat. Your public support and insightful words are much appreciated. Unsurprisingly, I've been deluged with private messages on this topic and I totally understand why; some of the stories are heartbreaking and I totally get that not everyone wants their trauma seen in public... however, I applaud those who do. Sending much love. K X
Thank you, thank you so much. You have articulated exactly how I feel. In fact I’m effing furious about what is going on. Ireland is the worst. Swapped priests telling women what to for men in drag telling women what to do assisted by the modern day sacristans- lefty women desperate to be seen as progressive & liked by men. I grew up in a deeply misogynistic patriarchy and after tentative progress I feel we are going backwards. As usual it’s women who are expected to make all the accommodations for men. I have male friends, who I thought were sensitive & intelligent literally wagging their fingers in my face ticking me off & shouting me down - right side of history my arse.
Thank you, Ruth — and, hopefully, that's starting to change...